1990. white. queer. adhd&autistic.

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the 99 squad as john mulaney quotes

holt-cozner:

Jake Peralta: I have had a very long day. I am very small… and I have no money… so you can imagine the kind of stress I am under.

Amy Santiago: Occasionally you get that one person that says “I really like that one part of this joke” and you go, “Oh thank you that’s my favorite part too.” But no, in order for it to be authentic hopefully you have jokes that everyone can just get on board with and then you have a few things for yourself.

Charles Boyle: The more you do stuff, the better you get at dealing with how you still fail at it a lot of the time.

Rosa Diaz: Some babies will point at me, and I don’t care for that shit at all.

Raymond Holt: When I was a little boy, I was more like a 67-year-old gay man that’s kind of over it sexually.

Terry Jeffords: Everyone get out of my way! I just want to sit here and feed my birds.

Gina Linetti: I look like I was just sitting in a room in a chair eating saltines for like, 28 years, and then I walked right out here.

Kevin Cozner: I’ll keep my emotions right here, and then one day, I’ll die.

Cheddar: Why do people shush animals? They’ve never spoken.

Posted: 20th of Feb 2019 with 1,738 notes from
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